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I saw you. You: enforcing the pullout of the Gaza Strip last weekend at a religious school near Sanur. Me: throwing rocks and screaming Hebrew text cursing all those who force the withdrawal of the Jewish people from their homeland. You were wearing a beautiful beige uniform with black belt . I was the young lady with the mustache and the yellow shawl. Wanna hook up? I'd love to make you some tea and knish in Homesh. See you?
I saw you. Last Saturday at brunch at the Old Country Buffet. Wow! I didn't know that there was somebody who loved ham and crème corn as much as I do. You: wearing overalls and using two chairs to sit down for a good ol' fashion meal of ham, crème corn, muffin, tater-tot hot dish, apple pie, second plate of ham, cookie, and three glasses of diet coke. Me: wearing an orange muu muu and crying softly by myself in the corner booth as I tried to eat away my self-loathing. Get back to me as soon as you can. My two for one coupons for the OCB run out in two weeks. I love a big boy!
I saw you. I have seen you from time to time over the last few years, but haven't had the courage to talk back...until now! Let's get to know one another. You: in demon form above my bed chanting in Mesopotamian from the Book of the Dead. Sometimes you are in the form of my neighbors cocker spaniel who speaks to me in Latin telling me to start random fires so you can . Me: the one you possess if I don't take my medication and look at things that provoke too much sexual thought. I'd love to meet for coffee and maybe more. But friends first. LTR possible.
I saw you. I looked out my window at four in the morning last Sunday, and lo and behold, I SAW YOU, CUTEY! I saw you stealing my neighbor's car and driving away mysteriously into the night. You: wearing sideways baseball cap, Cleveland Browns jacket, and baggy jeans worn low. Your smashing of the side window awoke me from my slumber, and yet looking outside at you in the darkness, it felt like more of a dream. And the way you yelled to your homey, "Get in the car, bitch!" I wish I was that bitch. Me: I'm just the girl in the next door window...and potential witness against you, so don't be a dog. Call Me!
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